I Woke Up at 4 AM and Took This Decision

Arushi Gupta

14 Jul 2025 — 5 min read

It was 4:03 a.m.

No alarm. No dramatic realization. Just a quiet, inexplicable moment of clarity. I opened my eyes, wandered into the kitchen, brewed a cup of tea, and sat in the stillness, the world asleep around me.

And then, without even planning it, I decided:
Today, I’m going vegan.

Not next week. Not when it’s more convenient. Not after I read a few more articles or finished the eggs in the fridge. Right now. That simple.

But of course, nothing about it felt simple in the days before. It was a decision built slowly, painfully, through tiny truths I could no longer unsee.

The Build-Up to 4 AM

I hadn’t just woken up that morning with a new personality. I’d been collecting pieces of the puzzle for years:

The documentaries I avoided finishing
The stories of factory farms I skimmed past
That time I made eye contact with a calf on a road trip and felt… something

It was all there. But I’d brushed it aside in favor of convenience and habit.

That early morning silence? It left no room for distraction. And when I asked myself the real question — “Why am I still not doing this?” — I didn’t like the answer.

If You’re Feeling the Pull, You’re Not Alone

If you're reading this, maybe you're right where I was: aware, curious, maybe even guilty, but stuck in the waiting room of action.

Let me say something up front:
You don't need to have a perfect plan.
You don’t need to have it all figured out.
You just need to start.

And it’s okay to feel overwhelmed. Going vegan isn’t just changing what’s on your plate — it often shifts your identity, your values, your social life, and your routines.

But here’s what helped me (and might help you too).

1. Start With Why — And Write It Down

[Image suggestion: Someone journaling by candlelight, scribbling thoughts in a cozy corner]

At 4 a.m., I didn’t reach for my phone. I reached for a pen.

I wrote: “I want to live gently. I want to do less harm. I want to feel good about my choices.”

Your “why” might be animals, the planet, your health, your kids, your future. Whatever it is — get specific. Put it somewhere you’ll see it. You’ll come back to it when the cravings or questions hit.

👉 Tip: Use a note on your fridge, a Post-it on your mirror, or your phone lock screen. Your reason matters more than any recipe.

2. Make One Meal at a Time Count

I didn’t go online and order ten vegan cookbooks. I made oatmeal.

That was it. Oats, almond milk, chia seeds, banana, cinnamon. And suddenly… it felt doable.

You don’t need to “veganize” your entire life overnight. Just make your next meal plant-based. Then the one after that. Keep going.

👉 Tip: Start with what you already love that’s already vegan — like pasta with marinara, lentil soup, or veggie stir-fry. Build from there.

3. Expect Emotions — It’s Not Just Food

No one warned me that going vegan might make me cry.

Not because I missed cheese (okay, maybe a little), but because I finally acknowledged what I’d been avoiding: that my comfort had come at a cost I could no longer justify.

There was guilt for my past choices, and grief for all the animals I’d ignored. But also… relief. Because I was finally living in alignment.

👉 Tip: Let yourself feel it. Journal it. Talk about it. Join vegan communities. This is transformation, and it’s emotional for a reason.

4. Forget Perfection — Embrace Progress

There’s this unspoken fear: What if I mess up? What if I accidentally eat something with milk powder?

Here’s the truth: You will.

You’ll forget to read a label. You’ll panic order something at a restaurant. And it’s okay.

Going vegan isn’t about perfection — it’s about intention. The goal isn’t purity. The goal is progress. Kindness. Consciousness.

👉 Tip: If you slip up, don’t quit. Reflect, learn, move on. Every meal is a new chance to do better.

5. Discover the Joy of Plant-Based Food

Something unexpected happened in my first week: I started falling in love with food again.

Trying jackfruit tacos. Learning how to cook tofu properly. Roasting chickpeas. Making a cashew cream sauce that made me weep slightly.

It’s not about replacement — it’s about discovery.

👉 Tip: Explore cuisines that naturally center plants: Indian, Thai, Ethiopian, Mediterranean. They’ll blow your mind and keep you inspired.

Explaining your choice to friends, family, or coworkers can be awkward. Trust me, I’ve heard it all:

“But where do you get your protein?”
“Isn’t that extreme?”
“Don’t plants feel pain too?”

Early on, I tried debating. Now I just say:
“This is what feels right for me.”

That’s it. No apology. No lecture. You’re not weird. You’re just aware.

👉 Tip: Practice a one-sentence explanation that’s honest but gentle. You’ll feel more confident and less reactive in the moment.

7. The Ripple Effect Is Real

The wildest part?

People noticed. They started asking questions. Some tried oat milk because of me. A friend swapped meat once a week. My partner started eating tofu voluntarily. My kid now lectures me about palm oil.

All because of that quiet morning decision.

You don’t have to change the world. You just have to change your corner of it.

And If You’re Standing on the Edge of This…

[Image suggestion: A beautiful sunrise over a quiet landscape – symbolizing hope and new beginnings]

If you're hovering on the edge — should I, could I, maybe one day? — consider this your sign.

You don’t need to wait for January. Or a health scare. Or a documentary binge.
You just need to decide.

Maybe your moment comes at 4 a.m., like mine did. Or maybe it happens in the car line, at the grocery store, during a chat with your kid.

When it does, trust it.

You don’t have to be perfect.
You just have to be honest.
You just have to begin.